This is a book about one of those really uncomfortable topics of parenthood. Its the conversation I think every parent dreads to have with their children but it is one that is so vital to have. In "5 Things Every Parent Needs to Know About Kids & Sex" Anne Marie Miller not only encourages us to have those conversations (its not a one time talk as she points out in the first chapter!) but arms us with information about the realities out there and the tools we need to work with.
The first chapter, The Earlier the Better, encourages us to begin discussing the issues of sex early on at an age appropriate level. By addressing issue early, she tells us the later conversations become more natural and normalized. The second chapter, Your Child is Not the Exception, holds a message that I think every parent needs to hear. We all want to believe that our child will learn what's best, that they will be the one to steer clear of every pitfall. The realities however are that our kids are picking up messages from everywhere, as chapters 3 (on media) and 4 (on Google is the new Sex-ed) explore. One of the greatest ideas I picked up in her discussion is that we want our kids to be safe but really we need to teach them to be healthy. The truth is we can't keep them safe from every danger in the world but if we teach them to be healthy, they will learn to steer clear of the danger out there and recover when they need to. The final chapter, Sexually Abused Children Rarely Speak Up, it a tough one. It is something that deals with something no one should ever endure but the sad reality is many have been and continue to be abused.
The content of this book is very helpful and is laid out in an easy to read and helpful format. Miller covers a lot of ground but then has "Bottom Line" sections where she summarizes and makes sure you've got the key information. There are also a number sections titled "Having the Conversation" that give you guidence in how to talk about the topic at hand with your kids. Finally, each chapter ends with a section titled "Experts want you to know" which includes information from a variety of experts backing up what she has discussed in that chapter.
Overall, this is a book that I feel will help parents be well equiped for journeying with their children through this topic. In an age where the world is so different from the one we grew up in, in terms of the impact of media and the internet, it is ever more vital we have the tools we need to navigate this with our kids.
(I received this book from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review, all opinions are my own)
Monday, October 10, 2016
Monday, September 5, 2016
Review: Prostitutes and Polygamists: A Look at Love Old Testament Style
I just finished reading "Prostitutes and Polygamists" by David Lamb. It is certainly a provocative title and perhaps not the book you want lying on your desk without explanation. Whether you keep it tucked away out of sight or not, it is most certainly worth reading. Though we often gloss over or sanitize some of the more difficult parts of the Old Testament, there are some tough things that it deals with. In this book Lamb addresses the difficult sexual issues we find in the Old Testament including prostitution, polygamy, incest, rape and homosexuality. Lamb addresses all of these issues with a balance of humour and sensitivity.
Lamb begins by acknowledging that we as humans behave badly (a play on words on the title of Lamb's previous book "God Behaving Badly") and that we see all kinds of bad behaviour in both the Bible and the world around us. He then has a chapter looking at God's ideal for sex within marriage, which is all too often as far as we go in the church. What Lamb does is acknowledge that many of us stray from God's ideal but that there is hope because the Bible is full of people that fell short and yet were used by God.
The issues covered in the chapters that follow are difficult to work through but Lamb deals with them well. An important point that he draws out is that the Bible is highly concerned with the welfare of the marginalized. When we see God's concern for the marginalized and read the Bible in its ancient context we see how radical some of the laws that we find repulsive really were. For example, the Bible specifically prohibits the rape of prisoners of war, further if an Israelite did capture a foreign woman he had to give her time to mourn and if he tired of her, he couldn't sell her, she had to be set free. This was a far greater level of protection and concern than found in other culture at the time, and frankly in parts of our world today.
Another passage Lamb looks at that we struggle with is Deut 22:28-29 where if a man seizes a young woman in the country and "lays with her" he is to pay the bride price to her father and he can never divorce her. Requiring a woman to marry her rapist is an abhorrent thought to us today but when viewed in its ancient context this law is actually pretty radical. First, in this verse the testimony of the woman is taken without a witness, second her rapist is required to marry this now un-marriable woman and third, he can never divorce her giving her more security than other women. In a culture where women were viewed as property, could not provide testimony in court and had no security apart from a man, this is pretty radical. Lamb observes that this and the other laws he looks at, actually provided women a greater level of protection than many find in our culture today. When we look at the trajectory scripture sets towards an ideal, we see that it moves us closer to the goal. (For more on this check out William Webb's "Slaves, Woman & Homosexuals" from IVP)
I think this is a book pastors should definately read. The reality it both the Bible and our culture have a lot to say about sex, though what they have to say is awfully different. God knew we'd fall short of His ideal and He gave us a whole Bible full of examples of others who fell short in all sorts of ways. We encounter these people every day who have fallen short of God's ideal for sex, either by their own actions or by the violation of others. The Bible shows us that God cares for all people, regardless of how we've fallen, and He can and will redeem us.
I don't think I'd every preach a sermon series on this book but I believe it can inform the direction we take with some of these more difficult topics as we preach through the Bible. That said, our church once did an exercise where everyone filled out a card with the one issue they wish God could deal with in their lives. As the cards were sorted over half of them were relationship issues. Also the stats are clear, there are people in the pew every week who struggle with what they have done or has been done to them and need to hear what the Bible has to say. I believe that showing people these kinds of issues aren't new and many are addressed in the Bible can provide both hope and a deeper appreciation for scripture.
I think this book can provide a good bridge between the Biblical Theology and Practical Theology sides of pastoral ministry, in the area of relationships, especially broken ones. Another book worth reading in a similar vein is "Flawed Families of the Bible" by Garland & Garland. This is another hidden gem of a book (that I found in a clearance bin of all places) that can help one touch on these very difficult, yet prevalent issues.
(I was not provided this book by the publisher, I bought it with my own money and thus was free say whatever I wished about it. If anyone from Zondervan is reading this feel free to send me review copies at any time)
Lamb begins by acknowledging that we as humans behave badly (a play on words on the title of Lamb's previous book "God Behaving Badly") and that we see all kinds of bad behaviour in both the Bible and the world around us. He then has a chapter looking at God's ideal for sex within marriage, which is all too often as far as we go in the church. What Lamb does is acknowledge that many of us stray from God's ideal but that there is hope because the Bible is full of people that fell short and yet were used by God.
The issues covered in the chapters that follow are difficult to work through but Lamb deals with them well. An important point that he draws out is that the Bible is highly concerned with the welfare of the marginalized. When we see God's concern for the marginalized and read the Bible in its ancient context we see how radical some of the laws that we find repulsive really were. For example, the Bible specifically prohibits the rape of prisoners of war, further if an Israelite did capture a foreign woman he had to give her time to mourn and if he tired of her, he couldn't sell her, she had to be set free. This was a far greater level of protection and concern than found in other culture at the time, and frankly in parts of our world today.
Another passage Lamb looks at that we struggle with is Deut 22:28-29 where if a man seizes a young woman in the country and "lays with her" he is to pay the bride price to her father and he can never divorce her. Requiring a woman to marry her rapist is an abhorrent thought to us today but when viewed in its ancient context this law is actually pretty radical. First, in this verse the testimony of the woman is taken without a witness, second her rapist is required to marry this now un-marriable woman and third, he can never divorce her giving her more security than other women. In a culture where women were viewed as property, could not provide testimony in court and had no security apart from a man, this is pretty radical. Lamb observes that this and the other laws he looks at, actually provided women a greater level of protection than many find in our culture today. When we look at the trajectory scripture sets towards an ideal, we see that it moves us closer to the goal. (For more on this check out William Webb's "Slaves, Woman & Homosexuals" from IVP)
I think this is a book pastors should definately read. The reality it both the Bible and our culture have a lot to say about sex, though what they have to say is awfully different. God knew we'd fall short of His ideal and He gave us a whole Bible full of examples of others who fell short in all sorts of ways. We encounter these people every day who have fallen short of God's ideal for sex, either by their own actions or by the violation of others. The Bible shows us that God cares for all people, regardless of how we've fallen, and He can and will redeem us.
I don't think I'd every preach a sermon series on this book but I believe it can inform the direction we take with some of these more difficult topics as we preach through the Bible. That said, our church once did an exercise where everyone filled out a card with the one issue they wish God could deal with in their lives. As the cards were sorted over half of them were relationship issues. Also the stats are clear, there are people in the pew every week who struggle with what they have done or has been done to them and need to hear what the Bible has to say. I believe that showing people these kinds of issues aren't new and many are addressed in the Bible can provide both hope and a deeper appreciation for scripture.
I think this book can provide a good bridge between the Biblical Theology and Practical Theology sides of pastoral ministry, in the area of relationships, especially broken ones. Another book worth reading in a similar vein is "Flawed Families of the Bible" by Garland & Garland. This is another hidden gem of a book (that I found in a clearance bin of all places) that can help one touch on these very difficult, yet prevalent issues.
(I was not provided this book by the publisher, I bought it with my own money and thus was free say whatever I wished about it. If anyone from Zondervan is reading this feel free to send me review copies at any time)
Sunday, August 21, 2016
Review: The Temple and the Tabernacle
I just finished reading "The Temple and the Tabernacle" by J. Daniel Hays and must say this was a excellent read. One might at first glance think a book by such a title deals only with issues of the Old Testament and belongs buried in the stacks of Old Testament Studies but this is not the case with this book. The very first thing that struck me when I opened this book was the colour. The book has many full colour illustrations throughout featuring artist renderings, archaeological finds and photos of scale models. The images are high quality and wonderfully compliment the text.
As for the text itself, the eight chapters are written in very accessible language keeping this book very readable. Though easy to read, it is full of excellent material and thoughtful insights. One thing that Hays does well in this book is begin with a succinct summary and finish with a conclusion that offers how this topic relates to the church today. This "so what" conclusion really helps one reflect on the content of the book and how to read the Old Testament in light of it. I think one of the most important points Hays makes here is showing how through the tabernacle and the iterations of the temple God was seeking to dwell with us but His holiness and our sinfulness required levels of separation. When one looks back on levels of separation that were required between us and the most holy place, it helps us see the incredible gift we have that the Holy Spirit now dwells within us.
One section that found particularly interesting was the chapter on Solomon's temple and the comparison between the construction account in 1 Kings and the construction of the Tabernacle in Exodus. His comparison of the two accounts helps show the trajectory the nation of Israel is on through the remainder of the book of Kings and provides a useful background to the events recorded in the remainder of 1&2 Kings.
The chapter dealing with the temple in the New Testament is also quite helpful. Apart from addressing the theological issues around the Temple in light of the reality of Christ, Hays does a great job at providing the background to the New Testament events that occur in and around the temple. His treatment of this background helps bring the events of the Gospels and Acts alive and give the reader a deeper appreciation of those events.
Overall I think this is a wonderful book that will enrich one's understanding of one of the most important structures and institutions found in scripture and give one a deeper appreciation of the God who seeks to dwell with us.
(I received this book from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review, all opinions are my own)
(I received this book from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review, all opinions are my own)
Tuesday, August 16, 2016
Lamentations - A Festal Garment
One of the books I read this past summer was "Five Festal Garments" by Barry G. Webb. This book is part of the New Studies in Biblical Theology series from IVP, which is a series of scholarly works tackling various parts or issues within the Bible. There are several topics addressed in this series that I find most intriguing and have found the volumes I've got to have pushed me deeper and challenged me.
This volume was certainly one that deepened my understanding of the five shortest books of the Old Testament (Song of Songs, Ruth, Lamentations, Ecclesiastes and Esther) by exploring how they fit into the whole of scripture. The reason for the title of the book is that each of these five OT books have been associated with one of the five Jewish festivals. It turns out the Jewish people spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out exactly how to handle these books (as seen by the various places some of these books found themselves in terms of location within the OT) and eventually lined them up with their festivals. This is an interesting use of these books that was not adopted in the Christian Liturgical calendar, but one that is certainly worth considering.
The one I found most interesting was the use of Lamentations in conjunction with the annual festival on the ninth of ab (mid-summer) which is a day to fast and mourn the tragic events of their people's history. Lament is something we in the western world do not do well and I was really struck at how healthy this day of lament could be. The original intent of Lamentations was to lament the destruction of Jerusalem at the hands of the Babylonians. The festival has developed further to commemorate a number of tragic events in Jewish history.
Lament as a whole, corporate or personal, is something that has not translated well into our western evangelical context. We seem to be good at lamenting the sins and misdeeds of our nation but not so good at including ourselves in that equation, corporately or individually. Lamentations serves as a corporate lament for corporate sin. The Bible also has plenty of guidance for personal lament, particularly within the Psalms, giving us words to say in those times when we want to express our grief. Life will always include times of sorrow and proper lament can be healthy and the idea of a time of lament worked into the calendar to force us to pause and lament for what needs to be lamented for could be very healthy.
This volume was certainly one that deepened my understanding of the five shortest books of the Old Testament (Song of Songs, Ruth, Lamentations, Ecclesiastes and Esther) by exploring how they fit into the whole of scripture. The reason for the title of the book is that each of these five OT books have been associated with one of the five Jewish festivals. It turns out the Jewish people spent a fair amount of time trying to figure out exactly how to handle these books (as seen by the various places some of these books found themselves in terms of location within the OT) and eventually lined them up with their festivals. This is an interesting use of these books that was not adopted in the Christian Liturgical calendar, but one that is certainly worth considering.
The one I found most interesting was the use of Lamentations in conjunction with the annual festival on the ninth of ab (mid-summer) which is a day to fast and mourn the tragic events of their people's history. Lament is something we in the western world do not do well and I was really struck at how healthy this day of lament could be. The original intent of Lamentations was to lament the destruction of Jerusalem at the hands of the Babylonians. The festival has developed further to commemorate a number of tragic events in Jewish history.
Lament as a whole, corporate or personal, is something that has not translated well into our western evangelical context. We seem to be good at lamenting the sins and misdeeds of our nation but not so good at including ourselves in that equation, corporately or individually. Lamentations serves as a corporate lament for corporate sin. The Bible also has plenty of guidance for personal lament, particularly within the Psalms, giving us words to say in those times when we want to express our grief. Life will always include times of sorrow and proper lament can be healthy and the idea of a time of lament worked into the calendar to force us to pause and lament for what needs to be lamented for could be very healthy.
Thursday, July 7, 2016
Review: Raising Uncommon Kids
I just finished reading "Raising Uncommon Kids" by Sami Cone this week. In this book Cone lays out 12 biblical truths needed to raise selfless kids. This is raising children who care for others and display the fruits of the spirit was all are to strive for. This book is not a step by step how-to guide to raise kids who obey our every command, rather it is about building the necessary traits in our own lives that we can model for our children. The book was challenging as it calls one to examine one's self and underscores the need to model the behaviors, and the values that underlie them, and live them out.
What I liked about this book is that the chapters are broken into short sections, which is helpful when the kidlets are running around. Each chapter also has a break out section with a mentor minute with a helpful, practical help from someone who has impacted the author. Each chapter then ends with a "Making it practical" section with about a half dozen practical things you can do as a family to work on building the chapter's theme into your lives. Many of the practical ideas are further fleshed out with additional resources available on the author's website.
All told, I found this a good read and one that my wife and I will work through together as wee seek to raise children who will be people of character.
(I received this book from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review, all opinions are my own)
What I liked about this book is that the chapters are broken into short sections, which is helpful when the kidlets are running around. Each chapter also has a break out section with a mentor minute with a helpful, practical help from someone who has impacted the author. Each chapter then ends with a "Making it practical" section with about a half dozen practical things you can do as a family to work on building the chapter's theme into your lives. Many of the practical ideas are further fleshed out with additional resources available on the author's website.
All told, I found this a good read and one that my wife and I will work through together as wee seek to raise children who will be people of character.
(I received this book from Baker Books in exchange for an honest review, all opinions are my own)
Wednesday, June 22, 2016
Our Daily Bread for Kids
Daily devotions are something that we, like many families, are trying to do and model. It can be hard to find the right one, as there are so many out there, and there is certainly no one size fits all. For where our kids are at right now, we've found the "Our Daily Bread for Kids: 365 Meaningful Moments with God" a great one. There is a short devotional with a verse for each day of the year (including Feb 29 so it really should be 366 Meaningful Moments, but I digress) that we ready each night as part of our bedtime routine. We have found it a great starting place for our daughter who is nearing 5 and our 3 year old likes the pictures. There is a 30 day sampler that we received from our church that pointed us towards this one. If you can get your hands on the sampler I highly recommend trying it or just go ahead and order the full year.
Thursday, June 16, 2016
Conversation about Romans 9
This past Sunday we had an inter-generational service at our church and so there was an abbreviated message. To "add some more meat" to the weekly podcast, Todd asked if I'd sit down with him and have a conversation as we worked through the passage in more detail. I've come to appreciate Todd and that he and I talk through some of his sermon stuff when it comes to working out series and the directions they could go. It was a pleasure to have this sit down with him and record it for those who listen to the Burnett podcast weekly.
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